5 Easy ways of handling an overly defensive partner
One of the most intriguing things about God creation- human beings, is how He came up with a masterpiece that is beautiful but with different amazing personalities.
The different personalities are what makes us coexist peacefully as one community. You can imagine if the world only had pure melancholics around, mmmh guess it would be so boring.
That aside, relations are pretty amazing because of what the different personalities bring to the table. However, dealing with some people can be really exhausting and if you don’t understand them, you might dislike them for no reason.
How do you deal with an overly defensive partner? Yes, you do love them but, you can just handle them so whats next?
Steer clear of blame game language
Whenever you are speaking to them or trying to resolve a dispute, avoid the “you did this narrative”. This will make them feel attacked and singled out.
To be on the safe side, tell then how you feel and how that has affected you or the relationship. Avoid pointing fingers.
Start the conversation on a positive note
Before you accuse your partner of anything or say anything that will throw them of balance, be positive.
You can try something like “I’m only telling you this because I care for you”. This statement will break the ice for you and it makes your partner more receptive and willing to listen.
Allow yourself to be vulnerable and take your share of the blame
There is something amazing about being vulnerable, it helps you connect with people at various levels. So try being vulnerable with your partner, this will break them and calm them down.
For it not to feel like you are blackmailing them in any way, take a portion of the blame. This will make you be the bigger person and will help solve the issue in a matter of seconds.
Also Read: Why modern relationships are a scam
Don’t diminish their right to feel in a certain way
You may not see eye to eye on certain issues but everyone has a right to feel the way they do. After all, it’s their emotions and you also got your demons.
Don’t dimish there right to feel like they do but just tell them politely how it’s affecting your relationship and you as an individual.
Don’t lose your cool
no matter what happens, do not lose your cool. remember that you are trying to solve a problem and you need a solution ASAP, so be the big guy and stay calm.
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